Raising the Roof!

Charlie Brown has kicked the football. The Washington Generals have won the game. The Independent candidate has been elected.

To put it another way, score one for the underdog.

After six months of nearly continuous turmoil, State Farm has decided to pay for my roof. I’m truly grateful. I just wish it had been sooner … and a lot easier.

For those of you scoring at home, the final tally looks something like this:

· One letter to the editor
· One Department of Insurance (DOI) complaint
· One file too thick for my filing cabinet
· One memory card full of photos
· Two engineering reports
· Two letters to lawmakers
· Two cars moved to another insurer
· Three fish sandwiches eaten during a consultation with a friend/attorney
· Eight or nine roofers’ opinions
· 10 bitter blog posts
· Numerous sleepless nights
· More sympathetic lunchtime conversations than I can count

After all of this commotion, I ended up exactly where my neighbor did, except State Farm cut him a check right on the spot.

The only conclusion I can draw from all this is that the process is designed to frustrate. Those with the least resolve and resources get run over like road-kill. The rest of us – those too stupid and too hard-headed to give up – can eventually be heard.

Thank you to my friends, family and neighbors for their support. Thank you to everyone who took their time to climb on top of my house.

Now it’s time to celebrate … by literally raising the roof.

Getting Stuck by State Farm

State Farm is running another commercial as part of its “get the car wash and the rinse” series.

In this one, several people buy popsicles from an ice cream truck. The stingy ice cream man gives everyone their popsicles, but withholds the sticks. Hilarity -- and a mess -- ensues.

I guess it’s clever enough, but maybe I'm not a good humor man for expensive advertising campaigns after having my roof claim denied.

The message of all this advertising is State Farm doesn’t cut corners like its competitors. Of course, you wouldn’t know it by me. I do, however, agree you’ll never have to worry about sloppy popsicles. After all, State Farm will always stick it to you.

Hosed by State Farm

In the last couple of weeks, I watched a lot of great basketball and saw a lot of stupid State Farm commercials. To me, any State Farm commercial is an affront. Every time I see one I think about how State Farm won’t pay $7,000 to repair my roof, but can dish out the big bucks to be the marquee sponsor of the NCAA tournament.

I’d like State Farm better if they promoted less and paid more. To put it another way, these ads could fix a whole lot of hurricane damage.

Insurance is about trust. You can’t buy trust during a college basketball tournament. You earn it by living up to your word.

Nevertheless, there is State Farm at every TV timeout, telling us how their insurance is more complete than their competitors. In one spot, a guy gets his car washed. He’s horrified to learn it hasn’t been rinsed. A goofball attendant reminds him that he paid for a wash … not a rinse.

This is a heavy-headed metaphor for State Farm. The message is that State Farm covers everything … the wash and the rinse.

Indeed. If my experience with State Farm is any indication, they are bound to give you a good hosing.

State Farm: You're No Panasonic

I was recently pleasantly surprised to find that some companies (not named State Farm) are actually still interested in satisfying their customers.

The experience didn’t exactly start out as an ode to customer service. My big-ticket, flat screen television was being invaded by red and blue blobs. The TV is new enough to be new, but old enough to be outside of warranty.

I reached for the Pepto-Bismol and the telephone. Someone in India answered. I was transferred a couple of times. More heartburn. I was already drafting a complaint letter to Panasonic in my head when something unexpected happened.

I found someone who actually seemed knowledgeable about my problem. He led me through a couple of diagnostic tests. When nothing improved, he promised to send out a technician at no cost. Within a week, my television was fixed.

Remember, this television was outside of warranty. Was this a recall? Was it a known problem? I don’t know and frankly don’t care. All I know is ESPN never looked so good.

Next time I’m in the market for a new TV, Panasonic will definitely be in my “consideration set,” as the marketing people are prone to say.

State Farm could learn from these guys.

State Farm Should Get a Clue

Not surprisingly, State Farm’s engineer has delivered a report in which he finds the company has no culpability for damage to my roof.

Here’s what he does blame:

• Poor adhesion of shingles
• Overlapping shingles
• Old shingles
• Weathered shingles
• High nailing
• Short nailing
• Finger-nailing (just kidding about that one)
• Poor ventilation

Here’s my theory: Mr. White did it on the roof with a candlestick.

In all seriousness, the report includes so many different explanations that it reminds me of a guilty man in an interrogation room searching for an alibi.

The engineer blames anything and everything except the most obvious – 80 mph winds from Hurricane Ike that damaged the roofs of every home around me. Their claims have been paid. Meanwhile, I’ve lost shingles, just like the roofers said I would.

Take heed, people, having State Farm insurance is like having no insurance at all.

This Just In

As I mentioned when I launched this blog, I never run out of opinions. So it should come as no surprise that I have even more to say about some of my previous topics. And away we go.

• First, I recently noticed that my favorite insurance company, State Farm, is running commercials staring basketball phenomenon LeBron James. What do they have in common? Both specialize in rejections. Seriously, State Farm, I need a new roof. What does LeBron need? Another Bentley? How about sending a little bit of LeBron's pocket change my way?
  
• Speaking of a phenomenon, the Snuggie simply refuses to die. It’s hard for me to pick out the dumbest part Snuggie folklore. However, if pressed, I would have to say it’s the video of people at a football game wearing Snuggies. That’s as unlikely as the return of the dinosaurs, right? Wrong. I swear I saw a woman wearing a Snuggie at my son’s basketball practice. She didn't even appear to have escaped from an institution. For more about the Snuggie phenomenon, click here.
  
• Here’s my political observation of the day: How come Democrats want to raise your taxes, but they can’t seem to pay their own? Are you listening Tom Daschle?
  
• Finally, my good friend Todd Tucker is about to release his latest book, Atomic America. As usual, I can’t seem to drum up any interest from the Courier-Journal about his story. If Todd would only consent to having octuplets, I think we’d be on to something. In the meantime, you can preview his book here.

Editor Scissorhands

The New Albany Tribune ran my letter to the editor about State Farm today. They only edited out two words: State Farm. Guess they didn't want to tick off an advertiser.

You can read the letter here. It is the second one on the page.

Right after the letter ran, a woman called my home. She said her son is having exactly the same problem as me. His insurer? State Farm.

I appreciate The Tribune carrying my letter. As a former reporter, I'm a big fan of community newspapers. I only wish they would've told me they were uncomfortable publishing State Farm's name. As for me, I'm not afraid. The truth is unassailable.

State Farm Presents CSI -- Roofing

In the latest roofing news, State Farm has presented me with a list of seven “independent” engineers to choose from to examine my roof for evidence of wind damage. After checking out their Web sites, I don’t think there’s an independent one in the group.

It appears to me that most, if not all, of these companies are “forensic” engineering firms. In other words, they are the CSI of roofing. Something tells me David Caruso isn’t being summoned to my house to conclude that the roof died of natural causes. Instead, he will be peering into his microscope, looking for the smoking gun of racking.

One of the companies says this on its Web site: “In the realm of asphalt shingles, habits of the installer are perhaps the single greatest asset or shortcoming to a shingle roof’s wind resistance. Therefore, we place great emphasis on how the roofing contractor performed his work from the early stages of preparation through the finished roof installation with respect to published manufacturer and code requirements.”

Does this sound like an independent company or one that is predisposed to blame installers instead of 80 mph winds?

Another company brags of its “litigation support.” Whose litigation are they supporting? Mine? I don’t think so.

By the way, forensic engineers don’t come cheap. I'm told they cost $500 to $700. I'd rather that money be applied to my roof. Unfortunately, as it turns out, my premiums cover roof autopsies, not roof repairs.

State Farm Update

It's Tuesday. That means another roofer has spent the day on top of my house. Like the three before him, he says I have extensive wind damage.

In fact, contractors have spent more time on my roof this winter than Santa Claus.

Nevertheless, State Farm continues to deny my claim. I recently filed complaints with the Indiana Department of Insurance and the Indiana Attorney General in hopes that these bodies will pressure State Farm to do the right thing.

It didn't have to be this way. Some of my neighbors were cut checks right on the spot. Frankly, I've spent more time fighting this than I care to spend. But I won't give up. Just ask my cousins. They were forced to spend an entire Christmas Day with me playing Intellivision football. I'm still waiting for a rematch.

Anyway, State Farm's latest tactic is to have an "independent" engineer review my roof. Of course, this "independent" engineer must be chosen from a list supplied by State Farm. Doesn't sound too independent to me. Maybe State Farm should pick their engineer randomly from the phone book, just like I picked my roofers.

If you've had similar problems with State Farm, I'd love to hear from you. Perhaps we can form a rock group called "Doug and the Denials." We better practice at your place though. I'm not sure my roof will hold up to the angry guitar rifts.

State Farm Creates State of Confusion

According to JD Power and Associates, there are key points in a person’s interaction with a business in which they become either an advocate for that company or an assassin against that company. State Farm sure isn’t turning me into advocate.

Let me explain.

I’ve had State Farm since I was 16 years old. Every bit of my insurance is with them (for the time being), including auto, home and life, which is why this so disappointing.

The remnants of Hurricane Ike hit my area late last year with winds of more than 80 mph. Shortly thereafter, I noticed my neighbors started having their roofs replaced. I became concerned that my roof might be damaged, too.

I called State Farm. They sent an adjustor. He told me there were a few damaged spots on my roof … below my deductible, of course. Many other shingles were turned up at the edges, but this was due to an installation method called racking, he said.

Having never heard of racking, I called a roofer for a second opinion. He said 80 percent of the shingles on my roof were loose, caused by the wind. A second roofer rendered the same opinion. A second State Farm adjuster was dispatched.

“Racking,” he said, as he explained to me how wind can miss one house while hitting the next two.

Ironically, my neighbor was introduced to “racking” too, at first. Then he protested. Then the insurance company cut him a check. That insurance company was State Farm … the same State Farm that I’ve paid premiums to for nearly three decades.

In fact, State Farm is replacing roofs all over my subdivision. Why they’ve drawn the line at me is anybody’s guess. I do know this: I’m not feeling much like an advocate.