Tough Weekend Technically Speaking

It’s been a tough weekend in the Big East – technically speaking.

At least four different coaches and a player picked up technical fouls on Saturday. Jamie Dixon and Steve Lavin both got them in St. Johns’ upset of Pittsburgh. St. John’s guard D. J. Kennedy threw one in for good measure.

Not to be outdone, West Virginia Coach Bob Huggins and Notre Dame Coach Mike Brey both picked up technicals in the Mountaineers upset of the Irish. And Louisville’s Preston Knowles and Connecticut’s Kemba Walker both got technical fouls on Friday night during the Cardinals victory over the Huskies. Just what in the name of Bob Knight is going on here?

If you ask me, this recent rash of technical fouls actually started on Feb. 9 when Louisville’s Kyle Kuric was called for “taunting” after glaring at a Notre Dame defender following a monster slam dunk. This drew outrage because it was so out of character for Kuric -- perhaps Louisville’s softest spoken player. If Kuric were guilty, then what about all his jersey popping, muscle flexing, finger-waving Big East brethren?

Rather than show restraint -- or admit a mistake -- Big East officials naturally overreacted. They have been handing out technical fouls like tattoos in the NBA ever since.

The crackdown leaves one confused about exactly what results in a technical foul and what doesn’t. To the casual viewer, it’s not always clear. On Friday, the officials were kind of enough to say into a national TV microphone that Knowles got his foul for encouraging a “bull sh@t” chant. Other times it remains a mystery.

But don’t worry. I’ve got your answers right here. Based on what I’ve seen, the following will definitely result in a technical: glaring (Kuric), enjoying a profane chant (Knowles), raising three fingers after a three-pointer (Marquette’s Darius Johnson-Odom) and generally throwing a hissy fit from the bench, unless, of course, your name happens to be Jim Boeheim (Dixon, Lavin, Huggins and Brey).

So how’s a boy to celebrate or to protest? Once again, based on my unscientific viewing, there are plenty of things a player can still do with impunity, including popping his jersey, flexing his muscles, blowing kisses, screaming at no one in particular and pounding his chest. I even saw a guy get away with slapping the ball after a timeout.

But no glaring … definitely no glaring.

* * *

Friday’s Louisville game also showed why players are so often tempted to abandon the fundamental play in favor of the spectacular one. U of L guard Peyton Siva stole the ball from his UConn counterpart and sped down the court for a sure, easy layup. Instead, Siva climbed the ladder and threw down a nasty 360-degree dunk. What was his reward for taking this unnecessary risk? Only every SportsCenter highlight for the next 24 hours.

Job Change Opens New Doors

For four years, I walked past the 21c Hotel in downtown Louisville, Ky., twice a day on my way to and from work. And almost every day, I exchanged some sort of mild pleasantry with the hotel’s doormen … a nod, a wave or a “hey.”

Our relationship wasn’t always this comfortable. In the beginning, it was downright awkward. A 21c doorman once mistook me for a hotel guest and tried to open the door for me. The suit and tie must’ve thrown him. I felt so badly that I nearly went into the hotel just to accommodate him. Instead, I passed clumsily by.

From then on, I employed several tactics to make sure this didn’t happen again. I walked faster past the hotel. I walked farther from the hotel. I even averted eye contact for awhile. After all, 21c is a pretty fancy hotel and the doormen could spend their time much better with actual tipping guests instead of some guy just passing through.

However, as the trips added up, the doormen eventually accepted me as a civilian in no need of entrance assistance. I walked closer to the hotel and slowed my pace. We exchanged twice daily greetings. The door remained hinged.

I changed jobs and hadn’t thought of this routine again until Friday night when my wife and I decided to stay the night at 21c. As I headed toward the hotel, I saw one of the regulars manning the door. Even though I hadn’t walked past the hotel in more than six months, I could see a faint glimmer of recognition in his eyes. To complicate matters, he knew me as nothing more than a passerby. Yet here I was clearly seeking entry. Time froze. The doorman gathered himself. He smiled and opened the door.

I was finally an actual paying guest in need of his services. It was a moment that was four years – and twice daily – in the making.

He Knows a Guy

My dad knows a guy.

Whether you need concrete poured, a wall painted, a tree chopped, a leak fixed or eyeglasses repaired, my dad knows a guy. He always knows a guy.

It’s a wonderful luxury to know the guy who knows the guys.

There’s only one problem. My dad also changes guys … rapidly and without much warning. Sometimes you’re still calling the old guy, only to discover that he’s already moved on to a new guy. Talk about awkward.

You see, even though dad knows a guy, he is always on the lookout for another guy who does it better or cheaper or both. Plus, if the first guy happens to be traveling on vacation, it’s always good to have a backup guy.

Often you’re left scratching your head, wondering why dad changed guys. After all, it’s never some calamity that leads to the change. Rather, he just seems to know when to do it, like a baseball manager knows when to change pitchers. When you meet the new guy, you usually agree that he made the right call.

Sometimes the status quo is the right call. For example, dad has been through multiple ophthalmologists, but still has the same dentist.

By the way, it’s good to be dad’s guy. Since dad has developed a reputation for knowing the right guy, his guy stays pretty busy.

Even in these connected times, it’s surprisingly difficult to find honest people who do quality work at a fair price. So whether it’s taking a dent out of a car door or sharpening a lawnmower blade, I rest easy knowing my dad knows a guy.

Odds and Ends

Several subjects have garnered my attention lately. On their own, they didn’t warrant a full-fledged blog post. Nevertheless, I just couldn’t let them pass without further comment. So here goes nothing ... or a little bit of something.

News Item: A Navy commander lost his command for previously broadcasting raunchy videos featuring homophobic and sexist comments and inappropriate images. The videos were intended to be a lighthearted way to boost the ship’s morale.

Comment: When did Michael Scott join the military?

News Item: Connecticut football Head Coach Randy Edsall recently accepted the same position at the University of Maryland.

Comment: Wonder if Edsall interviewed in a hoodie? Seriously, this guy has got to step up his wardrobe, as do a host of other college coaches. I hate to say it, but I’m looking at you too Charlie Strong. Take a page from the great Howard Schellenberger, who always wears a suit and a tie on the sidelines, even in a rain or snowstorm.

News Item: After missing two straight weeks for the holidays, the local recyclers left early this week, saying their trucks were too full.

Comment: Time for another Dale Moss story.

News Item: The ferry from Jeffersonville to Louisville for University of Louisville basketball games has been cancelled due to a lack of interest.

Comment: Please come back. I’ll never leave you again. I promise.

News Item: In just one week on Facebook, my 13-year-old son accumulated far more followers than I could ever think of getting.

Comment: At least he’s not on Twitter.

A Maiden Voyage to the KFC Yum Center

You’ve got to give my dad credit. When he goes in, he goes all in.

Dad has been threatening to go the KFC Yum Center for some time now to see the beautiful new home of our beloved University of Louisville Cardinals. My sister recently called his bluff, offering him a ticket and a ride with my brother-in-law to see U of L play their archrival, the University of Kentucky Wildcats.

That’s a hot ticket with two ranked and storied teams fighting for state supremacy. So hot it would easily have brought several hundred dollars or more on the street. Nevertheless, I figured dad would take a pass.

Did I mention dad doesn’t love crowds? This explains why he generally eats dinner at Cracker Barrel around 3 p.m. In fact, I used to joke that the only thing that could possibly lure him out with the masses was the boat show.

To everyone’s surprise, dad said he would like to go, joking that he might as well take it all in at once. In other words, the guy who doesn’t love crowds would see U of L play UK in a new arena before one of the most rollicking crowds of all time. Aside from a monster truck trip to accommodate his grandson, dad probably hadn’t attended a sporting event since Vince Gibson was the Cardinals’ football coach.

I’d believe it when I saw it … and yet I saw it with my own eyes. There he was about 15 minutes before tipoff with my brother-in-law at the KFC Yum Center ready to root them on. He even claims to have had a wonderful time, despite the lopsided score. He raved about the amenities at the KFC Yum Center.

Maybe he’ll even make it out there again sometime … after a 3 p.m. pregame meal at Cracker Barrel, of course.